by Allison Moore | Jun 12, 2014 | Day by Day, Uncategorized |
Thank you, everyone, for all your comments and texts about today’s pelvic surgery. I expect its happening now. I know it was slated for 7, but the doctor said he and his partner (they always work as a team…) will actually be starting around 7:30. I don’t know when he will be waking completely…I understand its a slow process. But this surgery is definitely the one that we have been waiting for, the 4th and final one in the rebuilding of the bones. With the brain hardware coming out the other day, its suddenly a flurry of activity. The heavy-duty nurses seem to have been replaced by less specialized ones, which I take as a good sign. But its funny to get used to all that intensity, and though this is good news, and I want my husband awake and present, I feel nervous about what lies ahead.
The ICU has become a safe and peaceful place for both of us. I know he is in good hands and feeling no pain in his body while he is in a coma. So suddenly, instead of elation at the news that he will be awake soon, I am nervous about his having to deal with the incredible pain and emotion of all this. Its going to be a major shock and he hasn’t gotten used the idea like those on the outside have. I know it will all be good. Its just going to be different for all of us, yet again. My mind rushes ahead to the unknowns and I am surprised at my mixed emotions.
But then I also remember the wonderful grace that those close to him have been able to experience. It’s been amazing, so much intense goodness in the eye of the storm. I must believe that he will get to experience that at an even deeper level, being the one smack in the middle. It’s not something I would wish upon anyone..but I wonder if I would trade it for anything, either. I hope Vernon comes to feel the same way. For now, it is time to move back into The Moment: today is a good day and we are each alive in it! Let us rejoice!
As well as as a picture of the peonies I picked up yesterday (so sad I almost missed the whole season this year, but I got some good ones at the end to make up for it!) I’m posting a beautiful song that Vernon loved when we first met (I’m sure he still does.) Its filled with mystery and meaning and it’s got a lovely, peaceful feeling. I could listen to it all day, Hope you enjoy it too.
by Chris Adams | Jun 11, 2014 | Day by Day, Uncategorized |
Allie asked me to put up tonights post. She provided the pictures, I’ll do the narration.
Vernon has been in a medical induced coma for 19 days. I’ve been trying to make it in as much as possible to see the old boy and do anything I can to help.
It just so happens that I missed the 9th and I wandered in around 5pm on the 10th. As I peered across room 6 I noticed there was a few things missing. The three items that measure oxygenation, pressure and drain fluid from his brain. Gone. Not only that but Vernon looked thinner. Water weight. Gone. They have pulled 3.5 liters a day out of Vernon’s blood through dialysis over 10 days now.
I asked the nurse (who I didn’t recognize) about what I noticed and she shrugged, somewhat nonchalant…”oh yes, they took out his ICP and ventric today. They’ll start waking him up tomorrow.”
It’s funny how the nursing staff can be so direct in their delivery before you get to know them.
As tears welled up, I laughed and sat on the bench listening to the typing of the nurse, the beeping of the machines and the peaceful in and out of the ventilator. Laughing quietly.
What a day it was yesterday.
Tomorrow is another very big day. They will be performing the pelvis surgery. It is a big surgery and it’s not to be taken lightly. There are a lot of very big arteries and veins they will be working around.
Pray for success in this surgery. The outcome of this surgery will have a huge impact on future mobility and comfort.
Vernon is continuing to receive dialysis and they are reducing his medication levels every 12 hours.
Pray he remains stable during the surgery tomorrow.
by Allison Moore | Jun 10, 2014 | Day by Day, Uncategorized |
After last night’s post, I want to follow up with Justine’s story today. Somewhere I had recently read that a child’s memory is first activated by some kind of traumatic experience. I don’t know if that is true, but it made me want to be very mindful of Justine’s first potential big-memory experience. Its nice to be available for both Justine and Maki in this time, as so often a child’s big experiences can happen outside of the family (good and bad) so I am hoping that we can all go through this together openly and lovingly. After all, they have their long lives ahead of them, and I hope this experience ends up being a positive memory for them, despite the pain and upset.
Justine already wanted to be a doctor before this ordeal, so it was appropriate that for her 4th birthday last week, she got a doctor’s uniform. How could we have known how soon she would actually be using her Doctor’s skills in a hospital?
Before we visited Daddy, she wanted to visit the statue of the Great Physician. She was not disappointed.
In the room, Justine kept telling the everyone to be quiet. She is so bossy…I mean, she has such great management skills.
Justine was out of the room at this point, exploring with the wonderful Lisa, Child Life Specialist. Dr. Nwagyu, our neurosurgeon (played by Forrest Whittaker in the film…he rolls his eyes when I tell him that) began, to my surprise, to remove the Brain Hardware in Vernon’s head. We are no longer needing to gauge the ICP (Brain Pressure) or add oxygen to the brain. Now that Dr. Nwagyu has done this, Vernon is slated for the elusive pelvic surgery on Thursday. And since this, we have learned from the current nurse on duty, they will begin to wean him from his heavy narcotics tomorrow, a little every twelve hours. This is the beginning of the waking stage! I can hardly believe its true!
Did I mention, Justine was making her rounds to the staff in the meantime. Here she is with my new best-friend, “Sister” Kris. Justine kept telling the staff, just in case they were wondering: “I’m not REALLY a doctor. I know a lot, but I still have a lot to learn.” I wonder if she was afraid they would ask for a diagnosis….or try to hire her.
She did great. Afterward, we just hung out and did some lighthearted stuff: lunch, a bit of shopping, a big-girl haircut.
But tonight, she did say, out of the blue: “Mommy, I had a great time at the hospital.”
We are so thankful for Vernon’s jump in recovery. We hold these things lightly but feel super-encouraged!
by Allison Moore | Jun 9, 2014 | Day by Day, Uncategorized |
Here is Vernon ‘traveling’ out of his room for today’s procedures. (Traveling. Don’t you love how I’m picking up official hospital-speak? By the end of this, I’ll be a pro.) It isn’t just his bed that goes to another part of the hospital, but all his IV attachments and support machines. Two more nurses are at the foot of his bed, guiding him through, not shown in this picture. The man is getting all the personal attention he ever deserved, and he is asleep for it!
As far as I understand, his gall bladder procedure went well and he can be drained more thoroughly, which hopefully will make the road clearer for his impending pelvic surgery. The word from the nurse is that Dr Wilkins is looking at Thursday for surgery, but we need to get the all-clear from Dr Nwagwu, the Neurosurgeon. We are learning, especially after last week, to hold lightly to the idea of dates and schedules. Flexibility is a virtue.
The big event at the hospital for me today was a visit with one of the Child Life Specialists on staff, regarding the children’s journey through this. Last week Maki started visiting his father, and seems to be handling things really well and openly. This week, Justine has begun to ask to see her dad, which I’ve been a little more nervous about.I have talked to her many time about the situation, how he is asleep, can’t talk to her, and has to be still in order to heal, but I didn’t know if actually seeing him in his state would be frightening.
After listening to Justine’s requests, and now discussing things with the Child Life Specialist (Lisa) I feel confident that this is the right time. So tomorrow we will make a special day of visiting the hospital. Lisa will meet us in the morning to explain things to Justine and then we will go make a quick visit to the room and meet the nurses. Tonight, however, just to test the waters, I showed Justine a photo of Vernon from today. She looked straight at it and after a moment said: “Daddy is so brave.”
Yes, he is.
Think of little Justine tomorrow as she takes on what may be one of the first big memories of her life. And as always, keep Vernon in your prayers.
-Allison
by Allison Moore | Jun 8, 2014 | Day by Day, Uncategorized |
There isn’t a lot to report tonight, at least as far as changes to Vernon’s progress. He will be going in for another CT Scan in the morning, as well as the Gall Bladder procedure, which was put off over the weekend. I expect good Dr. Wilkins will be looking closely to see if he can approve him for the pelvic surgery he has been itching to perform, but so far no new word on that. Just more of the same this weekend, but its good when we aren’t going too many steps in the other direction.
This is kind of a boring post tonight for those who have been faithfully following his progress so I will add a little behind-the-scenes story as well.
Since we are a family of artists, the kids and I have been turning some of our energies toward the table to make paintings and drawings for Daddy’s wall. We want him to have something nice and bright to wake up to when the time comes, and we want him to know that we have been thinking about him a lot during his time away.
It has also been good for us, just quiet time together, doing something creative, maybe listening to some music as well.
Here is Maki’s latest. He and Vernon have had a Spider Man connection for a long time. In fact (secret info unknown to most) Vernon got a spider tattoo as symbol of their connection when Maki was very young.
This is one of Justine’s many recent drawings/paintings. This one she actually drew the first week Vernon was in the hospital. It is of a little tent or house under an “angry storm.” No one can say this child isn’t able to express her feelings.
Now THIS is Pattie Herdell, owner of San Clemente Art Supply. We love her and her husband, Richard. Vernon and I actually got married in their backyard almost 8 years ago. We dropped by the shop a couple of days ago and she gave us a huge discount and tons of fun swag…we have all been painting a little every day since. What a blessing. Thank you Pattie! (PS if you are local, its the most amazing shop ever. If you weren’t an artist going in, you’ll be one by the time you leave!)
My latest card to V: “Anchored in the body, free in your spirit. We love you! Hope you enjoy the view.”
Maki and the ever-growing wall of pictures. If you have anything you want us to put on the wall to make it more interesting and beautiful when he wakes up, please send it our way. I’m hoping he will enjoy what he sees.
by Allison Moore | Jun 7, 2014 | Day by Day, Uncategorized |
“All human wisdom is contained in these two words: wait and hope.”
Alexandre Dumas
Fortunately , there isn’t much to report on Vernon except that he is doing well. Well…compared to earlier this week. The doctors even decided to forgo the gall bladder procedure slated for this morning because his signs are slowly, slowly starting to improve again. This kind of waiting I don’t mind. Thank you for keeping him in your hearts. The prayers are working!
The kids and I have been spending more time together at the table, making paintings for Daddy’s wall. A little art therapy has done us each some good. Maki and I went to take our latest offerings up to the hospital today before catching a movie together. Maki is doing great, a little more used to things. But of course he is just waiting and hoping himself for the day Vernon’s eyes open and a connection can be made again. I’m proud of his patience and strength. I’m thankful for his mother, too, who has come to be near him in this time.
While we were there today, Maki noticed something that struck him as funny: a band-aid on Vernon’s pinky. In all the wires and pads and blankets and computers, he noticed an ironic little detail like that. That kid’s got Eagle Eyes; he always has! So of course I took a photo. Hope it makes you smile like we did.
