“Life must not be a novel that is given to us, but one that is made by us.” —Novalis

My friend Nancy and I met for coffee this morning. She’s been involved with this story since the beginning, so I appreciated the metaphor she offered.   I had rolled my eyes at Vernon’s latest  situation: once again in an acute care hospital, where the carers, though kind and certainly equipped for the job, are not as relaxed and pro-active than what we have embraced in the past month at Kindred.

Nancy’s take was that watching Vernon recover is like reading a really great book.  A long book, perhaps, filled with plot twists and unexpected changes.  But the reader sticks with it, no matter how slow it gets in the middle… because she has come to love the hero or  at least has become interested in how the writer could (im)possibly resolve things by the end.

As I tend to like really long novels over short stories, I should be able to enjoy a story with lots of ups and down and in our case: backwards and forwards.  I don’t know how it will end. But we are not giving up on the story.

I am not surprised how Vernon is being treated at St. Jude’s. We were in an Acute Care Hospital for three months, after all. But though the care is exceptional, they won’t release him until they know the infections are gone from the tube/opening they were charged to remove. And as Vernon’s bedside cheerleader, it’s frustrating. I accept that they are doing their jobs at this new hospital. At the end of the day, his health is the most important thing. These are the viruses that can break a body down and it is good to get on top of them.

But as his wife, as his friend, I want to see him get stronger. I have come to enjoy watching him with his therapists. I like to see him working. I think he probably misses them too, because he seems back to where he was three weeks ago. I prefer to see him stimulated…closer to the man we all know.

BUT…this is a hiccup. The part in the book where we —or maybe HE—wants to give up. But we won’t. We are too far in. We’ve spent too many nights staying up, turning the pages, wondering what is next.  We will trust that the Author has a really great story in mind, despite this turn.

That’s what got us hooked in the first place.