It has been said the clothes make the man. And of course we all know better. How frivolous, how old-fashioned, how superficial.
But when I brought a new T-shirt in to show Vernon today, (thanks Trevor) he couldn’t wait to get into it. He raised his eyebrows in silent approval at the design and reached out for it. Then he started to tug on the snaps of his hospital gown as if he was trying to undress himself. He had been tugging at the front of the gown for weeks, but it was hard to tell if he found the fabric uncomfortable or if he was just agitated in general. I wasn’t sure if Vernon could even wear a T-shirt yet, what with all the tubes and IVs connected to his body.
But we gave it a go. In all my experience with a post-accident Vernon, I’ve never seen him so willing to help us do anything as he was when we were putting on that tee. Not only did he try to tear the gown off his shoulders, he bent his head low to get through the collar, and lifted his strong left hand for the sleeve before we even gave directions.
In his new shirt, he seemed a little more confident when he was placed in his chair and he received a few compliments from the staff as he was wheeled to the gym. I suppose just getting out of the hospital gown gave him a slightly better sense of identity, as if to say: “I’m different. I’m not just one of these patients. I’m not here to stay.”
“Know first who you are, and then adorn yourself accordingly.”
– Epictetus
I’m actually quite glad to know that Vernon doesn’t recognize himself as an old man in scrubs. That has got to be a good sign of his mental awareness. Even in the above picture, he looks more like the man we know and love.
Vernon was a self-employed designer, he’s never needed to dress up much, he is most comfortable in tee-shirts and corduroys or jeans. But where I get a thrill over finding two for $20 tees at H&M, Vernon takes a lot more care into choosing his basics. They have to feel right, have to be cut right. Lets just say he spends a lot more money on a single clothing item than I do, even though most people wouldn’t know it. He has never been showy, but personal style is important to him. His is a subtle, understated classiness. He must have felt terrible wearing that hospital gown, seeing all the other patients wearing the same standard-issue cloth.
And it isn’t frivolous. A little bit of self-respect, personal choice can make a huge difference to a rehabilitation patient, trying to make sense of everything in his new surroundings. Perhaps its the beginning of recognizing the person in the mirror he wants to get back to.
“Looking good isn’t self-importance; it’s self-respect.”
– Charles Hix
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next…a hair cut! 🙂 I’ve invited his hairdresser to come up next week.
He looks so handsome!
This is one of my favorite posts yet. I love the pictures of Vernon and the quotes especially “Know first who you are, and then adorn yourself accordingly.”
– Epictetus. Brilliant.
you have always understood more than most the greater depths of fashion, my friend.
Wow!!! What a difference! If I can see it in the photo, he must certainly feel it!! I’m in awe at how you can read what simple things will make a huge difference to him! You continue to amaze me…. as he does! Xoxo
Thanks Valerie! I think he looks good too. As for noticing the simple things…I guess life slows down a little after 4 months of watching for movements! 🙂
He looks so sharp–both alert and terrific in that shirt!
This is really cool. Changing into a new T-shirt and out of hospital gown is new life and catalytic to the hope you have been writing about. We prayed for God give Vernon hope. Probably a more important step of progress than any of us would have thought. More Lord!
You were right Allison. Navy was definitely the right choice for Vernon. As much as you say you are not the clothes shopper that he is, I bet he is glad about the decision you made here! Hopefully this will become a favorite T-shirt that he reaches for – for many years to come (and we will happily replace it for free whenever he wears it out…). Keep up the great work on your recovery Vernon; if you are every in doubt about your progress, have Allison read her observations from the beginning of this blog and show you the pictures of your transformation. Seeing you in that shirt reminds me of a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis…
So great to see. Ive spoken so much with Vern about style over the years that I know this is another sign of good progress. As a matter of fact the last thing we discussed before the accident was what one should wear whilst driving a scooter in california.
Allison – have you mentioned this blog to Vern? Or is it to early for that? I’ve commented on another update, probably it was a bit impressionistic, but if the occasion is there please tell him that Helge says “cheeze mayte”. It refers to a private joke Vern and I share. Perhaps it could help mnemonically (if thats an english word)..
I will! Thanks for mentioning it.
Vernon looks so much more himself–so glad you realized he needed this. He looks so handsome and alert–and well on the way to recovery! A phone call to you and a new look for himself–what a great week so far!
Such a fun post! I agree, Vernon always does have the best clothes, but he isn’t flashy, as you put it.
Allison i have read this twice and just agree with you so much ..Vern has always had his own style , and we know he would hate to be dressed the same as everyone else ..what a wonderful idea , and you made it together … xx hugs to you both xx
Allison, Vernon looks like he feels better. Bless his heart after all these weeks in hospital gowns he look so good. On ward and upward.
Becky
must have been a bit of work getting that tee on but so worth it!!!
Love this post!! Why didn’t I think of that. What size does Vernon wear? I’ve got a Montgomery Motorcycle shirt for him. Not sure he’ll be as excited about the design, but it sure beats a hospital gown.
Hes a large! At least that is what he is able to get into easily. He has lost so much weight so it swims a bit. I’m sure he would love a MM T. He loves you guys and your shop.
This is such good news. Praise God for giving you more and more hope and faith for a complete recovery. He is making good progress.
So refreshing to know that the Lord is answering our prayers! Someday, I hope we get to meet the “new Vernon” in all his shining newness that he is experiencing every day. (Never even met Allison, but we did pray for her (as NOW) as she was growing up in her wonderful family.)