“When writing the story of your life, don’t let anyone else hold the pen.”
I know that Vernon has a way to communicate ‘Yes‘ to me, but we still haven’t figured out the ‘No.’ I imagine it’s pretty frustrating for him to only be able to actively answer in the affirmative. We have tried blinking and hand squeezing: once for yes, twice for no (a la the book/film, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly.)
But we still aren’t reading each other enough to have more than a one-sided conversation. I talk so fast with so much energy and hope, and Vernon is still moving a few notches below his normal mellow self. Today when I first went in, he was trying to move his mouth to speak but I couldn’t understand. Hopefully speech therapy is just around the corner, or who knows? One of these days he may just start chatting—it’s been known to happen.
When I mentioned, “What if you try to write things down?” his face lit up. His eyes widened and an obvious brightening came over him. So I tracked down a clipboard, some paper, and a dry-erase marker that seemed like it would be easy to hold.
A little trickier than I’d anticipated, what with his finger-sensor. But the nurse came in to take it off and he did a little better.
Here is a video of one of his tries. He really was game for this…we worked for about an hour straight, which is a long time for a semi-comatose guy. He didn’t get far, but I could see he was responding with a real memory of (and maybe even a devotion to) writing or drawing.
Ultimately, he found the pencil to be the most comfortable…I think I’ll start with (that or a slimmer pen) next time.
Here are a few of Vernon’s results. I’m thinking of hanging them on the refrigerator door.
Actually, here is a funny story: on my way out, I showed these drawings off to the head nurse, as I crossed her path.
“Look!” I squealed, “Arent’ these great?”
She kind of smiled and nodded and said, “Oh yes. How old?”
I looked at her in disbelief. “Um…47.”
I’m not sure I’d be so braggy if these were from a two year old. Ahhhh…perspective.
10 Steps to Becoming a Better Writer by Brian Clark:
Write.
Write more.
Write even more.
Write even more than that.
Write when you don’t want to.
Write when you do.
Write when you have something to say.
Write when you don’t.
Write every day.
Keep writing.
I think he there might be something to that. We will try again tomorrow.
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How cool to see his progress in controlling the pencil! I love how you continue to think creatively in what Vernon may be needing or open to in a given day. Seriously frame-worthy stuff. 🙂
I think it might be only because I so recently had a baby/toddler. Not that he is at that stage, obviously. But I feel a little more fresh in the patience/encouragement-of-small-things department. Make sense?
Indeed it does! <3
Love
HI Jill! Love YOU!
i don’t agree with that head nurse : ( continued hugs and prayers…
It was pretty funny, I have to admit! I don’t agree with her either, though!
This is awsome and better than awsome! It must feel so Nice to be able to take charge of the pen and work. So good that he wants to. Paintbrush NeXT? The difference to be able to hold a pen and Draw and not being able to – its huge! Now Vernon is making Things for his own wall – and no worry about anyone saying theire like childs drawings, they are not, but the start of something good.
Maki is happy to see this, and happy that his dad is determined.
Lots of love
Paintbrush…exactly what I was thinking!
Thanks for your continued encouragement, Synovve. I have an idea that Maki and his dad might start working together in clay…Maki can make projects as he likes 3d things, and his dad can start working with the manipulation and feel. What do you think? Pass it on to him. I think it could be a new form of art therapy for dad and lad.
That sounds like a great idea. Maki loves 3-d thats right. Its interesting With art in this situation – Its something Ive been thinking a bout a lot, because I dont want to make art, what I make often troubles me – but painting makes me so happy. I Wonder why it makes me happy, and I know Im Lucky to have this Activity I can always just do. All artists have this advantage, and for other People holding a pencil or brush doesnt feel the same.
Dear Allison, I’ve been praying for you all since a mutual friend shared your wonderful family’s journey, as my husband had recently woken up himself, but in CICU. I just had a book made of the photos and prayers sent to me over our family’s journey, and these drawings might just be the best art yet in the book of your journey. They are joyous. Thank you for allowing us to pray for you all. I think it is amazing that we cheer each day for Vernon’s progress even though we’ve never met.
Thank you Carol. oh how I hope your husband is recovering quickly. Its so strange, isn’t it? So surreal to be on the outside, watching in. But its also amazing to know how many people actually recover well from these sorts of journeys. Hopefully our men will be better for their traumas, and they will always look at life in a fresh, appreciative way. Same for us, the wives. Thank you for reading and watching us. Let me know if there is a place to follow your story as well… xo Alli
That video was awesome…so exciting to see! And what you said about his expression and trying to speak! Yeah Vernon! Eva and I are praying for you tonight! More creative expression! More healing! We love you Vernon!
It is so heartwarming to see these little steps each day. They seem to be coming faster and and with more determination. God bless you and the joy you take in helping with Vernon’s progress, in sickness and in health, in good times and bad!
Thank you so much, Barbara. Sometimes I dont see the progress as fast as others because I am there every single day. But when people on the outside tell me they see the difference it is very encouraging. Thank you again.
WOW!! and double wow..amazing , Vern wanting to express himself with pen and paper…. Vern could draw and paint much earlier than he could write ( at the age of two he was drawing amazing pictures, much better than could, and i was two years older)..it seems Vern is getting ready to move on with his healing… is it the photo , just wondered why he is using is left hand??? i know i couldn`t write with my left hand!! Vern can used both hands i know ..but he writes with his right hand… can he not use it at the moment?
well paints next, and then the clay ..who knows Maki and Vern could be building amazing things with Lego soon!!…Lego is always a good way for dads and lads to do some bonding , daughters and mums too!
may this comunication with you both continue, wonderful news and encouagement to wake up to this morning, love you both lots xx
ps what about those big triangular pencils with grips on?? used those for Aaron when he learning to write , got his from ELC, sure you have some in America!! if you cannot find any , shall i get some and send you?? xx
It seems he is favouring his left hand at the moment. But the more he uses this hand to write, the more I notice the right hand starting to twitch, as if it is jealous. Who knows if that means anything? It may be just that the left side of his brain is taking longer to heal…and therefore the right side is dominating. Never really understood the validity of all that science. But I’m sure there is something to it.
That sounds and look great,each day it get better.
May be try to have a page with all the alphabet with big letters.
I had pt used the alphabet spelling out what they want to say.
Even if he start with yes or no it will be good.
We will keep praying for his recovery and Grace & strength for you.
Bless you.
more info please? Sounds like a great idea. Want to share that idea in person, Talar? Call me first though, as he has an infection.
So exciting to watch the progress, Praise be to God! It has been a long, hard road and I know there is more to come, but just this much is so much more.
I love reading about all the progress going on. The clay will be a great way to strengthen his hands. Thank you for posting each day, Allison; I look for it.
Amazing to see Vernon can hold a pen! Thank you so much for sharing this special news with us. The prayers and medical care make a mean team!
Amazing! From my distant perspective, it seems like there has been such a huge jump in development recently. For him to be able to say ‘yes’ to you and to understand what you are asking… that is such a great sign! And the ability to move a pencil is amazing too. I can’t wait to see how that develops!
Joe and I are just sitting here in awe and wonder at the beauty of seeing Vernon “writing” on paper. We both have tears in our eyes with thankfulness to the Lord. All our love, J and N