Before I talk about Vernon, I want to make one last little plug for his fundraiser this weekend.
I think it will be a great community get-together and a lot of talented people have donated their handmade goodness.
San Clemente Art Supply —1531 N El Camino Real, San Clemente, California—Fri: 6-9 Fri party with music and refreshments. Sat: 10-6 shop all day.
Here are some of the paintings I’ll have on sale. Come grab a bargain!
When I told Vernon the other day that friends were organizing a craft market for him, he lifted his eyebrows and said: “What do they need me to make for it?”
“You don’t understand, Honey. It’s to raise money for you. Not for you to donate to.”
“Why should they want to raise money for me?”
“Well, because you haven’t been working. And you shouldn’t need to worry about working right now either.”
“Of course I can work! I was working this morning.”
And so goes many of our conversations. A little reality, a little fantasy, connecting as much as possible in the common ground between. Its taking him a while to understand his predicament, but lately I’m realizing this may be a blessing.
I believe most of the trauma occurred on the left side of Vernon’s brain. It is generally understood that the left hemisphere of the brain controls the right side of the body and the right controls the left. It’s been obvious for awhile that Vernon’s left side has come back to movement much better than the right. He is able to write his name with his left hand now and gesture very smoothly with his left arm. But he still favors the right side, protecting it as if it was the broken arm (it wasn’t.) The legs are another story for another time.
Although some say science doesn’t actually prove that the right/left-brain behaviorisms are based in the hemispheres of the brain, its long been accepted in popular culture that that the Right tends to be more creative, thoughtful, and subjective while the Left is more logical, analytical, detail-oriented. With Vernon as a guinea-pig, I would say this is most likely true. His right-brain is strong and kicking these days. And the left? Well, not so much.
Now Vernon has always been a creative guy, and intuitive and conceptual thinker, so a lot of his personality is clearly there. If anything, it just seems heightened by the fact that the practical side hasn’t quite emerged or caught up. It is a lot of fun to talk to Vernon…he has an answer for everything, even if he is making it up. He can talk about his feelings in very sweet way, especially when it comes to the children. He is very romantic when he talks about the early days of our relationship, letting me in on little secrets of what in his mind that he has never told me before. I have no idea if those were his true thoughts then or not, but it is lovely to hear now.
As his personality gets smoother, with slightly less agitated and confused glitches, I realize it is probably working out MUCH better that it was the left side of his head that was most affected. He is generally happy, though he does get bored easily. It’s as if he’s in a sort of lucid dream, in terms of his mood. He knows where he is but he is choosing to just accept the strangeness of it all rather than try to work out the details, to figure it all out. I can imagine that if thing went the other way, if it was the left side that became dominant, he would struggling with his circumstances a lot more, especially without his memory to help him connect the dots.
I trust the left will slowly re-awaken. Though Vernon was probably a right-dominated personality before, he had an incredibly rich mind, and that included a strong logic and sense of details. He was a font-designer, after all. You need to be pretty detail-oriented for that!
But in the meantime, I’m thankful that he’s enjoying his present state as much as possible, it makes it more enjoyable for me too…because I am a bit of a dreamer myself.
Here is a fun little online quiz to see if you what side of your brain is more dominant.
(Thanks, Kirsten Ford, for visiting with us today and taking these pictures.)