“Knowing how to live is not something we have to teach children. Knowing how to live is something we have to be careful not to take away from them.” Colin Beavan
Yesterday, Vernon continued to move his hands and respond to directions. Justine and my parents visited in the afternoon. He really started trying to communicate with them, squeezing their hands and moving his lips as if to say something. The determination in his face was very clear. He obviously knew what was happening and was trying to hard to talk. But with the trach, he is only able only to move his mouth without sound. I am going to talk to the doctors tomorrow about moving him into a 4-guage, so we can begin to get him either off the trach completely or at least begin some kind of speech therapy.
The fact that he was trying was immediately clear to Justine, our 4-year old. Here is a little video of her explaining what she thinks he is trying to say.
I am fascinated by the way that children deal with these things. She is so comfortable in her father’s presence and doesn’t seem to mind the slowness of recovery like even I do. She sees he is sick…in a place that will heal him…and he is getting better. That’s it. So simple. None of the worries and what-ifs that adults think about.
She is spot on with her words too…her interpretation of what her father might be telling her. Of course that is what his heart is saying. “I love you and I love to hear your voice and I want to be your friend forever.” Isn’t that what a father would want to tell his children at the heart of everything?
Today, Vernon had to have a procedure to replace his dialysis tube, so he will be staying in the hospital a little longer. He was pretty tired from that so his hand motions weren’t as strong.
BUT…
He has started to track movement: he is able to follow voices and people around the room with his eyes. I don’t know how well he can see, but when I put pictures of the children in front of his face and moved them, he certainly seemed focused and followed them with his eyes.
(To Maki: see you are still a part of your dad’s life and healing, even though you are away for awhile. I think he is ready for your video tomorrow. We love you!)
“Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh, and the greatness which does not bow before children.” Kahlil Gibran
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this is all so freaking exciting, we are telling everyone we know that vernon is on the mend! keep it up, dude!!!!
I love this…what beautiful children, both Justine and her wonderful big brother. Allison, I’m sure others have said this, but one thing I know about recovery (both physical and emotional) is that healing is not linear. A good day is often not followed by a better day. We love you and hold you in our hearts. xoxoxo
Thanks Marie! Linear? I don’t even know what that word means anymore…hahah! 🙂 Thanks so much for your support, sweet M! xo
God gave you and Vernon Justine and Maki to bless you and help Vernon with the healing process. Glad they don’t weep for their dad but have amazing patience. I’m weeping for joy at each step forward Vernon makes.
Ali, this is such a precious post. How amazing is Justine! I can just imagine Vernon’s proud Daddy smile. We continue to pray for Vernon’s recovery and for you as a family. Reading and seeing Vernon’s recovery through you eyes, words and pictures means so much. Thank you for sharing so many personal and wonderful moments with us all. Love you lots my friend, I wish I was closer to do more than just pray. Xx
I LOVED the video and Justine’s childlike insight into her father’s heart. It reminds me so much of when Ben’s Dad responded to little two year old Christopher. May we learn again to see as they see.
what was that story like, Marilyn?
…just so incredibly beautiful…long and sweet. Vernon is saying something long and sweet to his precious daughter and her heart hears her Daddy! Thank you Father that Vernon is healing and starting to connect again, in new ways. Thank you for taking such good care of him! And giving strength and insight to Justine and Allison! And Maki too. Love love you all!
Sounds like there’s a little crack in the ice! Will keep praying for breakthrough!
Love this post so much. She is so special, like Maki- and what a perfect and beautiful quote is that by Gibran? Love it.
I was looking to try and find something unique and inspirational- something which I had wanted when I was with my mom daily…then I realized it was the support of loved ones and friends which you have in multiples lovely lady. I remembered a favorite quote of Gibran’s:
“The appearance of things change according to the emotions, and thus we see magic and beauty in them, while the magic and beauty are really in ourselves.”
With this much love do I see Vernon in perfect health every moment, he comes home to this every day while his littlest angel interprets.
Much love to you all and especially for you Maki & Justine <3
i can’t believe it! the signs of progress he is experiencing is amazing – considering all he’s been through, it is just amazing and EXCITING! continued prayers and hugs…
speechless….touched…..tears……Thankful……Allison you are a wonderful witness of Love, Goodness, Kindness, Hope and everything else that God gives us and you are living it out loud for so many to see, feel and hear….and to KNOW……A City on a HILL…..at a very uncertain time…..and then your Precious daughter sums it all up…with HOPE and Perspective…..LOVE LOVE LOVE this…Love you…continued Prayers…..guess I wasn’t so speechless after all…..I am sure Vernon is trying to tell someone and everyone to give HIS Amazing wife a Great Big HUG….He will be back full throttle soon!!!!
Ladybird, this little girl is so much like you! How lucky we are to have you both here on the planet with us at the same time!
I have been reading your posts about Vernon’s recovery and am praying for you all and for Vetnon’s recovery. I love the music and the art and the flow of friends and family through Vernon’s room. Your children are beautiful, as is your loving care of Vernon. (I think you will recognize my name but just in case you don’t, I am your Aunt Sue’s friend from college!)
The picture of Justine’s hands on top of Vernon’s hand – somehow that just contains everything. Love to you all!
hi Allison ..as always i have read your post and watched the video twice and read everyones comments before i post mine…. then i sit and think what can i say ,at 6am every morning that can be hard, what can i say that i haven`t said before??? i guess today i have to say THANKYOU! THANKYOU for a millions things …..
“Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless.”
― Mother Teresa
Dear Allison, I watch for your posts on Vernon’s recovery everyday and loved the video of Justine explaining what her daddy was saying to her. I am truly amazed by your strength and courage through this ordeal. My heart goes out to you and your family.
I found this blog through Facebook and have been following Vernon’s journey. I have a 21 month old son who’s at home with a trach and portable vent. He uses a passy muir valve to help him speak. It either attaches to the end of the trach or inside the vent tubing. It may be an option for Vernon during this stage in his recovery to help him communicate even more with his loved ones. You are in my family’s prayers.
Thank you. I just saw today that they are keeping one on hand in the room…hopefully that means they are thinking of using it soon. I don’t think he is quite there…just able to move his mouth very subtly so far. But I hope we will get to hear him soon. That is very encouraging about your son and his ability to speak. I hope he is able to move on from the trach in the near future? But it sounds like you are figuring out how to get the most out of life anyway. All the best to you!
Wow. Speechless.