Taken in the Crypt of Winchester Cathedral, November 2016
Here are a few things I read about Anger in Grief this week. I found them very helpful indeed. These quotations are pulled from this website.
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When we are grieving, anger in another indicator of how much we love the person who has died. Anger is a normal part of grief, a bridge of strength and energy (at a time when there is little of either) across the abyss of loss.
Anger tells us that we are alive and we loved someone very much. We are angry because now that person is dead. Anger is progress because it means we are now feeling the e motions of grief a needed in order to heal. The more we honor our loss by allowing ourselves to feel anger, the more healing we will do.
Anger is not a problem. But misdirected anger is. Anger turned inward. Angry energy will not go away. It must be released. The more you can understand your anger—how you react when you are mad—the more you can make changes that allow for your healing.
Never forget that you are angry because you deeply loved and now the one you loved is gone. You may be shocked when the intensity of your anger is in direct proportion to the intensity of your love for the one who has died. Explore your anger because the more you allow the feelings to surface the more of yourself you will find. Mostly, it will be the pain of loss and your grief will change form again, not in circles going nowhere round and round, but in upward spirals of healing.
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Thank you Allison. So needed in my own life right now.
Allison,
Thanks for sharing these quotes. Hurting for you, and cheering for you as you go through the process. Glad you are looking for the why’s.
Perfect words for me today as I found myself initially surprised by how well I’d gotten through a difficult social situation, but then how angry I felt about it later. “At first, the fact you lived through the loss is probably surprising to you. Then more feelings hit, and anger is usually at the front of the line…” I think this applies to many situations. Thank you for sharing it. I’m glad you are honoring your anger. My struggle is finding the right spaces for it.
Glad that you found something that spoke of your anger and the coming out of it. We are here with you as you go through this. Have a good Christmas for God sent His son to the earth to dye for all of us and to take us home in the end.
Becky
Allison. Thinking of you this Christmas, I’m sure there are many mixed feelings and emotions in your house right now, just want you to know we’re thinking and praying for you. Lots of love to you all, Kurt and vicki x