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With all the world-shaking tragedies in Paris over the weekend, it felt wrong to sit down and journal our little life here without taking pause. I wrote a lot of words last night, hoping to process some thoughts. But they just ended up as words, nothing helpful except for perhaps  organizing some emotions for myself, so I’ve erased them this morning. Our little story seems so small in the light of these big terrible things happening…and yet our life goes on. I will say that my heart goes out to those who have been affected by the attacks in Paris. I can only imagine the terror of anyone who was there or nearby. There is one way that I have changed in how I read the news though. Where I used to only notice the number of those killed, I now pay as much attention to then number of those who have been critically injured. Their lives and their families lives will be changed forever too, even if they survive.  It’s heartbreaking and angry-making all around.

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Yesterday was Maki’s 14th birthday.  We celebrated by visiting the circus.  Cirque du Soleil, that is….the mind-blowing human circus.  It happened to be in town, just a mile or so from Mesa Verde on this very day of all days. We visited Vernon in the morning before attending the matinee performance at the grand chapiteau. It was fantastic, but I won’t go on about it here (though I could!) Mostly I enjoyed Maki enjoying it. A gift that gave back to me 14-fold.

Vernon has slipped back a little this week and is showing signs of edema in his neck and is drooling for the first time that I remember (this has been consistent for several days.) The doctor doesn’t yet know what could be the cause, but its worrisome. Vernon is better than he was a month ago, but not as good as he was last week…so we continue this precarious walk that is still moving upward, if we speak in general terms, but backward if we look at specifics.

Joe managed to get Maki a visa card for $30 that he tried to secretly pull off as a gift from Vernon. He wanted to make sure Maki had got something from his dad and vice versa, just like he had acted on Justine’s birthday in June.

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