I had to go to the Civic Center/Courthouse this morning to manage some business paperwork. This is the same building that Vernon and I first got married in….with Maki as our 4 year old witness. I remember taking a break from work in order to do the ceremony. We stopped and got rings from the trinket machine at Toys R Us. I didn’t dress up, but I did wear a new white summer blouse. (I wrote about the day here.)
There were so many girls in white dresses today. I felt a little funny taking care of my boring business, while betrothed couples waited in the queue behind me. I imagine if you need a boost of romance in your life, you might take your lunch break on the local Civic Center grounds. There are certainly a lot of couples with the light of Possibility shining in their eyes! Each with a different past and future, sharing the present: an official commitment to life with their mates. But surely some had been married before—maybe divorced, maybe widowed. Some were already in long term relationships and finally taking this step. Some might be spontaneous, some saving money. Some of these marriages might not last. But in this moment they expect them to. Or maybe not? Maybe some were marrying for convenience or a Green Card. It’s not for me to know. But to get to witness the joy of the day, in passing all these strangers, is a soul-filler for me.
By the way, I still wear my real wedding ring (not the plastic one.) I sometimes wonder how long society would approve of my wearing it. It feels too strange to take it off yet…and ultimately, it makes my life less complicated too! 🙂 On that note…a public tip: If you wonder if it is too soon to ask a widow/widower when they are going to date again…the answer is: it is. That is for the widowed person to tell you—if she or he wants to—not the other way around.